How to Improve Your Body Image and Self-Esteem

Well hello, beautiful. Since you’re reading this, chances are you struggle with your body image and self-esteem. 

Some days, you feel ugly. We’re guessing you also feel pretty alone in your struggle. Like you're the only ugly duckling surrounded by beautiful swans. You may find yourself standing in front of the mirror thinking, "I hate everything about the way I look."

And, on top of that, you feel that everyone else is looking at you and thinking the same thing about you. Sometimes, you just want to crawl into a hole so no one will see you.

The struggles that you are dealing with are real. But, they can be fixed! They’re not going to go away with cosmetic surgery, hair straightener, makeup, losing weight or gaining weight. Instead, you’ll feel better by fixing your body image and self-esteem.

It's not just you

It's easy to feel like you are the only one struggling. But, you're not. In fact, 91% of women are not happy with something about their looks. Think about that for a minute.

That's nearly every single woman.

Studies find that age and race make no difference. That means if you are in a room full of women trying to blend in with the crowd because you feel judged and don't want others to notice you, the majority of females in the room are feeling the same way.

It shouldn't be this way. Our Creator knit us together just as he wanted us to be. He knew what he was doing.

If you want to change the way that you feel about yourself and learn how to love yourself, you need to learn how to address your body image. You can learn to go from insecurity to security.

What is Body Image? 

Body image is probably something you've heard of, but you might not have really tried to think about the body image definition before. Your body image is how you see yourself.

Your body image is not what you look like.

It isn't what is actually looking back at you in the mirror. It's how you see what's in the mirror. This includes how you experience your body, what you believe about your appearance, and how you think others see you.

The body image definition is not just how you feel about your body, it's how you feel in your body.

If you have a negative body image, you:

• See your body differently than it is in reality
• See others as attractive, but not yourself
• Feel awkward and self-conscious in your body
• Are uncomfortable and ashamed of your body
• Connect your size with failure.

If you have a positive body image, you:

• Feel confident and comfortable in your skin
• Have a mental image of your body that matches the physical image
• Enjoy your natural shape
• Don't obsess over things like weight, calories, and food
• Feel thankful for the body that God gave you
• Know how to love yourself

Each woman has a different idea of what is the "right" way to look. That means that body image can take on a lot of different descriptions. You may think you are too fat or too skinny with not enough curves. Your chest might be too big or too small. Your hair is too curly or too straight. Maybe you are too tall or too short. Or, your skin is too dark or too light. 

Have you ever noticed that as women we tend to want whatever the thing is that we don't have? Girls with straight hair want curls and those with curls want straight hair. 

Why do you think this is? 

It's because it's not really about looks at all. You need to learn how to change what you're focusing on. Stick with me because I'm going to help you do that. in just a minute. 

Why we struggle with look because of with low self-esteem

When you have low self-esteem because of looks it all comes down to your body image. Somewhere along the journey of your life, you picked up body image issues. 

Where does low self-esteem from body image come from?
There are several different things that can impact your body image and self-esteem. 

1. Family influence - Parents often pass down negative body image issues. And, it makes sense because we learn from what we hear as we are growing up. If you constantly heard your mother talk about dieting and hating how straight her hair is, what happens if you look a lot like her? You're going to hate your straight hair and think that you weigh too much. 
2. Friends - If you are surrounded by friends that are constantly criticizing their looks or comparing themselves to others, it's very easy to fall in line as well. 
3. Media - The media causes all kinds of issues for women when it comes to body image. Models and actresses tend to have the same type of body shape and it's not one that the rest of us are usually able to match. They have teams of people working on their hair and makeup, yet we compare ourselves to them on a regular basis. 
4. Social media - We live in a world of selfies. But, how many selfies do you think women take before they post one? You can bet it's usually more than one. And, there are plenty of filters that can be used and editing apps that allow women to make themselves look the way they want to look before posting a "quick" pic. 

We think that others see us the way we see ourselves.

When you suffer from a negative body image, it can feel like there is a spotlight on you everywhere you go. You constantly feel like all eyes are on you. You feel like your "imperfections" are all that anyone can see. 

The truth is, the reason you think that's all others are seeing is because that's all you're seeing in yourself.  

So, if you think you're the ugly duckling, you automatically assume that everyone else is thinking the same thing. 

The link between body image and eating disorders

It’s bad for your mental health to live with body image and self-esteem issues. Poor body image robs you of self-confidence and lowers your self-esteem. But, it can also be bad for your physical health as well. 

When your body image is distorted it can lead you to take drastic and dangerous measures to try to reach what you think your body should look like. This can cause women that are in a healthy weight range to think they are overweight, which can lead to eating disorders. 

With a distorted body image regardless of how thin she gets, a woman will still believe that she is overweight. 

This is just one of the many reasons why it's important to address your body image issues in order to improve your self-esteem and confidence. 

Changing your looks won't improve your body image and self-esteem.

If you're like I was, I'm guessing that you have a list of things that you think if you could only change those things about yourself, everything would be better. It might be your body shape, teeth, skin, height, or any number of other things. Let me clear something up for you.

How you feel about your body image and self-esteem isn't going to change if your body changes. 

If you are a size 18 and struggle with your body image, you're also going to struggle if you lose weight and end up a size 4. Why? It's not an outward change that needs to happen, it's an inward one. 

If you don't believe me, one study even found that women that had cosmetic surgery were no more satisfied with their bodies than women that hadn't. That means women who take surgical action to create a body they feel confident in, still don't have a good body image. 

You need to change your perspective. 

How to love yourself and improve your body image

Your body image and self-esteem issues have nothing to do with your body at all. It's not about what you look like. The real problem is much deeper than that. You have to address the inner issue. The reason you never feel beautiful is that your body image is broken. 

The good news is you don't have to leave it like that. You can free yourself from the issues that caused it. 

Here are four simple things you can do to improve your body image and learn how to love yourself:

Step 1 - Treat yourself like a friend

Would you talk to your best friend the way you talk yourself? I highly doubt it. That's why you're friends. 

Thoughts like, “I’m so stupid. I’m so dumb. I’m ugly. I’m fat” have to disappear. Start viewing yourself as a friend. If you wouldn't say something mean about your friend, don't say it about yourself.  Stop judging yourself and knocking yourself down. 

If your friend was saying negative things about herself, I bet you would point out all the great things about her. Do the same for you! 

Step 2- Focus on how complex your body is

Think of all the parts that make up your body. It's unbelievable! You can't judge your entire body off just a few parts of it. When you look in the mirror, start working on seeing ALL of it and not just certain parts.

Think of everything your body is doing at this moment. Your heart is pumping blood throughout your body. Your lungs are taking in the air that you need. And, your brain is understanding what you're reading as fast as your eyes are taking it in.  

AMAZING!

That's just a few of the things that your body is doing.

Step 3 - Think of your body as a container

Is your body who you are? NO!

Your body is just a container that's holding you. Your personality, character, and spirit are who you are. God gave you your body as a vessel so you can enjoy this world. Stop seeing yourself as just a physical body. You are so much more. 

Step 4 - Accept yourself

You have imperfections. We all do. You could ask the girl that you think is the most beautiful, and if she's honest, she would have things about herself that she wished were different. Remember that 91% of women can relate to you. 

Instead of focusing on what you think is wrong with your body, focus on what's right about it. Replace your negative thoughts with this saying: My body is a complex container that I care for. 

Are you ready to transform your body image? Do you want to feel confident and comfortable in your skin? Are you wondering if it's really possible?

The Love My Body: Body Image Starter Course will walk you through the training that you need to transform your body image and self-esteem. You can learn to love your body just as it is!